Monday, October 20, 2008

How to hang like Mia & Jas

DESTINATION 1:
1. Make sure you have an economy sized bottle of Sangria. It's $3.99 at Rite Aid
2. After you park, hang out in the car. Position your camera on the dashboard, take approximately 100 photos of yourself (don't worry, the photos are supposed to be unflattering). Get out of the car once you've realized you've been taking pictures for 30+ minutes.
3. If there is a line outside of your destination, weigh your options. How strong is your buzz? Weak? Consider going back to the car. But wait, how long is the line? And dammit, why the hell are you even standing in line? So many things to take into consideration.
4. Once inside, talk to random people. At least one dude will proclaim his love for you, that's okay. If it gets intense, it's time to move on.
5. Be concerned for others. Make sure people have been freaking & be prepared to make suggestions for people to freak if not enough freaking has ensued. The desired result may sound something like this: "I freaked a couple girls, and I hope to freak some more."

DESTINATION 2:
this one is easy.
Stay inside of the car for the remainder of the night. Don't even bother getting out. Make yourselves laugh for an hour and spill your beverage all over the car (passenger will ride in the back seat on the way home)

BACK HOME:
Tell secrets
Try to get the red wine stains out of beige interior...keep hope alive!
Attempt to do your homework, but fall asleep before a book is ever opened.


Options include:
Listening to Sisqo's "Unleash the Dragon" album (You will know all of the words).
Wondering if that damn sign reads "FONTENOY" or "FORTEROY"
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Using bathrooms for the opposite sex
Unnecessarily (idiotically) running across the street
Wondering why you're not filming this

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